Bland observations about the weather. Can you believe the heat, cold, snow, rain, sleet, hail (pick one) we've been having?! It must be global warming and anthropogenic cooling and climate change (pick two or more)! And how about that bag of hot air in the corner office!
Hackneyed commentary about the value of teamwork and the contributions of “the Garden” to the surrounding community. Kudos to various employees for chipping in on some stupid Hospital-wide event or other. Overblown statements affirming the leadership abilities of the management team.
Dollops of sanctimony, sententiousness and self-congratulation.
Why don’t I see more initiative from this Department?! You know I've always striven to empower each and every one of you! You act as if you don’t want to work harder and longer for less pay! I am shocked, hurt, vexed, pissed-off, chagrined, irked, peeved, dismayed, dyspeptic and disappointed!
The financials are improving but nowhere near where they should be. Prime Health’s injection of capital will help—but only after six more years of zero percent pay increases, increased employee health insurance premium cost-sharing, mandatory flu shots (along with castration for all male employees—sexual harassment claims are costly!) and cockamamie employee surveys.
Together we can turn the corner! We just have to work as a team! You’ll see! Two percent raises, $500 bonuses and $20 Meijer gift certificates are just around the corner!
Meaningless fluff intended to uplift and edify.
Lame, unattributed quote.
Enjoy your picnics and families. Make sure you pause this holiday to remember all those brave boys tossed into Moloch’s maw for no good reason.
Have a great weekend!
P.S. The comic strip is optimistic.